“As a result of this, many [of] his disciples returned to their former way of life and no longer accompanied him. Jesus then said to the Twelve, “Do you also want to leave?” Simon Peter answered him, “Master, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and are convinced that you are the Holy One of God” (Jn 6:66-68).

22 August 2021. 21st Sunday in OT. Cycle B-2021. Josua 24:1-2a, 15-17, 18b + Ephesians 5:21-32 + John 6:60-69

“I will not leave you, no matter what,” I promised the Lord. But, just like Peter, when I got through rough times, my faith got shaken.

I continually built up my devotion to Him, even increased the frequency of praying, adoring Him, and going to church. Well, as a child, I did expect that He kept his promises for those who would remain in Him and abide in His love.

I always mumbled, ‘I will not leave the Lord, no matter what; no matter if He gives me the crumbs while He gives my neighbor the lumps.’ But when He seemed deaf to my prayer, grumble I did not, but sulk I did.

“Your will be done, not mine,” I would pray, but I still caught myself cooling off when I could not get my way. I would pray less, went to church less often, and cooled down my adoration. Until guilt overwhelmed me, that He did not deserve my tantrums.

I got resuscitated with the thought that if I turned away from the Lord, whom else would I turn to for favors? The devil would only deliver a flash of lightning from his darkness, while the Lord would render a flood of light from His glory.

Why would I trade my birthright of eternal bliss for a brief fill of momentary delight? The devil seeks the ruin of a soul, not its salvation. The devil thinks that a soul loves the Lord only in the middle of comfort, but I love the Lord because I have no better choice than to trust the Father who loves me even in my discomfort. After all, if I count my blessing, they outnumber my misery.

Licking crumbs in the light of the Lord satisfies more than relishing a lump in the darkness of Satan. VSS

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